The things we do for love...

Okay so everyone close to me knows that i'm single, and now you do to. 

I'm not quite sure where i'm trying to go with particular post, but here is all the things i've been currently thinking about...

So because I'm single, I simply can't help thinking about being in a relationship. This may sound like the most desperate thing but I really want a boyfriend! I mean why is it that this one little thing that I so "desperately" want, is literally being shoved in my face to mock me? Everywhere I turn there's a couple! Cuddled up, kissing, holding hands. Post after post on facebook about "Oh how I love my boyfriend. I miss my boyfriend. My boyfriend is the best!" Why can't I have that? It's a beautiful thing and it's what i've craved for so long.

I somehow don't want to count my exes as relationships at all and heres why.

I'm not counting my 6th grade love "pentagon" as one even if it lasted 3 months. We were kids.

My freshman year in high school "relationship" lasted about 5 months. But the reason I'm not willing to call it an actual relationship is because we simply just had the title of boyfriend & girlfriend. The sitting at lunch together, hugging, standing everywhere side by side with your arms around the others waist, quick pecks before parting ways to class, talking on the phone every night, and those cheesy love notes we used to pass. We only hung out togther once and it wasn't even alone. And you got to love the jealous friend who lies to break us up...HA it worked!

Later on, my junior year, my next "relationship"  only lasted 1 month and a half. *Sigh* I was hoping that this one would have lasted longer but what can i say? "He just wasn't that IN to me." But how can you be when you're strictly on a textual level. (If you don't understand what textual means, it's simply texting.) We only hung out once (I really don't get what's with the "hang out once" deal) and the rest was all by cell phone. Not to mention he was about 5 minutes up the street from me. And I had asked many times if he wanted to do something as simple as go for a walk and we couldn't even do that! But the way it ended hurt the most...

Now I've tried online dating and that is somewhat a joke. Lies on top of lies on top of more LIES! It's mostly made up of fans of cybersex:P I have found some pretty good guys and some absolutely horrible ones. But as far as it goes for the good ones, how can you actually tell if it's good? People lie so much that they actually start to believe it themselves. Age, occupation, experiences... etc.  From the ones that want phone sex & nudes to the caring, considerate ones who are actually looking for love! I been through alot in this department. And have come to the conclusion that it 's not for me. I'm not able to withstand another textual/skype fling. I want to see and feel my partner! Is that too much to ask?

I honestly don't know what to say anymore so therefore I'm done...

Love,
 -Vampcake